talhotblond (2012)

Talhotblond (2012)

“talhotblond” is a passable made for television docudrama account of a tragic and bizarre 2005 case of fabricated internet identities and murderous jealousy.

Courteney Cox does an adequate job of directing the mostly uninspired(ing) cast (the former “Friends” star also co-produced and appears in her film, which Cox reportedly shot over just 16 days), with Garret Dillahunt (Fox TV’s “Raising Hope”) emerging as the most commendable of the bunch.  Dillahunt is suitably creepy as a mild-mannered middle-aged Midwest husband and father who comes completely unhinged with obsession over an online persona he knows only as “talhotblond”, whom he believes to be a teenage girl.

Really, can anything good possibly come of this?

Yeah, it could have been better.  But if you’ve seen any measure of flicks fully fashioned for the tube, then you have almost undoubtedly seen way worse.

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Kristy (2013)


The played to death “young woman alone being stalked by crazed killers” gets a little different, and a lot weird, twist on things in “Kristy”.  For reasons never fully funneled into focus, the whack-jobs bent on butchering our beauty, in addition to despising those they pronounce privileged, seem to be anti-Christian satanic cultsters, as well.  However, this is mostly conjecture, as the script never conclusively confirms such, and there is no basis to believe that the object of their psychotic scorn (Haley Bennett) is particularly God-fearing, either.

Nevertheless, by film’s finale, this gargantuanly gallant gal, having agonized through a brutal baptism by fire, has, in a very visceral sense, been born again to launch into a fiercely forged crusade.  And, man, will there ever be hell to pay.

Picture something along the lines of “do unto others”…only eliminate the benevolence.

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Willow Creek (2013)


We already know damn well right where we’re headed in the found footage flick “Willow Creek” just as soon as the premise is presented.

Joe Swanberg and Kristina Klebe are a considerable comfort to behold as a curious couple wandering the wilderness in search of “Bigfoot”. And they sure as shootin’ had oughta be hot, as Bobcat Goldthwaite (yes, that guy), in a daft directorial decision evidently intended to create suspense, at one point in his film trains the camera on the pretty pair for positively one of the most interminable, and uneventful, stretches in cinematic history.

That the entirely predictable payoff is nothing at all noteworthy comes as no shock, as what we have endured leading up to the flaccid finale has fallen feebly short of being even mildly remarkable.

If ever the sensation seizes to scope out this “Sasquatch” saga snore-fest…squash it.

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White Rabbit (2013)


Harlon (Nick Krause in a mesmerizing performance) is a troubled teenage kid who talks to Graphic Comic Book characters and bunnies in “White Rabbit”. As in with them. And it’s not a damn bit laughable.

Viciously bullied at school and relentlessly belittled by a far from Father of The Year (“True Blood”‘s Sam Trammell) at home, Harlon embarks upon a gradual descent into disturbing dissociation and despair. Veteran indy Director Tim McCann effectively establishes an unnervingly ominous tone throughout his odd yet absorbing film. This includes the decidedly interesting choice of accentuating Harlon’s escalating break with reality by way of a constant and eerily foreboding music under bed for about the good final third of the story.

It all builds in portentous crescendo to a startlingly unanticipated ending that is as unorthodox as it is a relief.

That’s how at least one viewer is choosing to interpret it anyhow.

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